|A Day in the Life|
"A Day in the Life" is the ninth video in the EverymanHYBRID series. Seemingly a breather episode at the time it was uploaded, this video introduces Jessa, Ryan, and Alex, as well as the area around Baldpate Mountain.
[We're back, HYBRIDS. Sorry for the delay - things got a little messy getting all of these clips together, etc. etc. It was a beautiful day in Central Jersey!]
[Slow pan across a road and woods. 'EverymanHYBRID' crosses the screen. Light piano music plays.]
[Cut to Jeff standing in front of a hiking map, doing introductions. The camera pans to each person as he says their names.]
Jeff: Hey guys, we're back. And we got a couple new people with us today. My girlfriend Jessa [she waves], you guys know that ugly guy [Evan smiles and nods at the camera], that's Ryan, and my brother Alex, and we're just taking it easy this week, and we're gonna take a walk through the woods basically.
Vince: [turns the camera to face himself] And you can't forget my beautiful face. Let's get to it.
[Cut to Jessa walking along a gravel path in the woods. Jeff is filming.]
Jessa: You're stuck with the slowest person. I'm really slow. I have short legs.
Jeff: [laughs] No worries.
[The rest of the group is walking ahead of them. Jessa jogs ahead to catch up with Evan and Vince.]
[Cut to Ryan unzipping his backpack on a rock. He takes out a piece of paper (probably a map). The rest of the group is standing around at a crossroads in the path, chatting or looking around.]
[Cut to Evan and Vince walking side-by-side on the path.]
Vince: I walked for ten miles. And I got to mile [unintelligible] and I ran into [unintelligible], and she asked me 'oh where'd you walk' and I told her and she was like 'you are a champ.'
[Cut to a small clear stream running through some rocks.]
[Cut to Evan and Alex wandering off the path, exploring in the underbrush. There's an abandoned and mostly collapsed stone building a little ways off the path. The rest of the group follows. Cut to a shot much closer to the house. Jeff is filming.]
Jeff: Oh, wow.
[Cut to close-up of Jessa. She beams at the camera. Pan over to Vince, who also smiles. Pan around to Ryan's back.]
Vince: See if you can find copper we can sell.
[Cut to Evan still clambering around on the house. The rest of the group seems to have moved back towards the path.]
Vince: Evan, if there was a girl version of you, I would date you.
[Cut to Ryan helping Evan climb over a wall and back onto the path.]
Jessa: He's just blockin' it out.
Evan: [spreads his arms wide, looks up at the sky; speaks in a silly German accent] Oh, zen beautanice!
[Cut to the five boys walking on the path. They're talking and laughing. Jessa is filming.]
Jessa: [turns camera to face herself] They are the coolest people I know.
Evan: [stops walking, turns back towards Jessa] Hm?
Jessa: Nothing. Talking to the camera.
[Cut to the group continuing to walk down the path. Evan is talking about how nice the day is and how glad he is to be outdoors. The others seem to be agreeing with him. Jessa pans up to the sky, then around past the group and to the woods and path behind them.]
[Cut to the camera on the ground, filming everyone's shoes as they walk past. Alex moonwalks past.]
[Cut to the group sans Evan walking down the path; Evan is filming. This clip is in slow motion. Jeff seems to be singing or talking as he walks over and hugs Jessa. Alex turns around and gives them a big thumbs up.]
Alex: [drawn out, slightly distorted] Perfect!
[Jessa and Jeff disentangle themselves, though they continue holding hands as they walk.]
[Cut to Evan standing over an old stone well/pit. Vince is filming.]
Vince: Don't really have much of a choice now, you're on national TV.
Evan: [laughs] All right hold on, let's get rid of all this-- [waves a twig in the pit, clearing out spiderwebs] all of this shit out of the way.
Evan: Lemme just get the scorpion outta there. [laughs] Wait, hold on, let me grab all the little snakes in there.
Vince: I'll have a nice refreshing--
[Evan carefully climbs into the pit.]
Vince: And there you go folks. The amazing Evan.
Evan: [nearly steps on something gross] Oh, what is that. Call me--
[He stands up, brushes off his arms, then spreads them wide to show that he's in the pit. It's only about mid-chest deep.]
Vince: Now just imagine spiders.
[Cut to Alex and Evan staging a mock martial-arts fight on top of a stone wall. There's deliberate color distortion in this one, with multiple color changes in the backgrounds as they fight.]
[Cut to a shot of the woods. Pan down the stone wall to Evan and Vince hugging.]
Jeff: Some bromance goin' on.
[Cut to Jeff walking along the top of the stone wall. He pans up to the woods.]
Jeff: Hey, let's get a-- gauge the-- the size.
[He stops by Vince, and lifts the camera up high so he can lean into the shot and gesture with one arm.]
Jeff: It's just massive.
Vince: Check it out. Even over there, like-- look at that.
Jessa: It looks like a [unintelligible].
Jeff: Oh yeah, huh.
[Cut to the group standing on a path. Vince walks up to Jeff, looking concerned. He's pointing off to the side, and walks Jeff off a few paces to talk privately. Camera pans over to Evan (whom Vince was pointing at), looking dazed as he shuffles off towards a large fallen tree. He's very out of it. Cut to them on the same path, Vince looking a little less worried.]
Vince: We, uh, we just double-teamed it. [Realizes his mistake, laughs; Jeff giggles] Oh, we double-teamed it. Double-timed. And, um, so far so good.
Jeff: [points behind the camera] Here come the stragglers.
Vince: [also gestures] Here come the laggers, but that's okay.
[Turns to see Ryan and Jessa walking towards them. Jessa spreads her arms in a 'oh, what?' type gesture.]
Vince: Evan seems to make a pretty good... good...
[Pan over to Evan, who has his back to the group and is staring at the fallen tree, arms limp, head cocked to the side.]
Vince: Evan's being Evan. Um-- but, other than that, I think we're doing pretty good so far. [Cheesy smile and thumbs up at the camera.]
[Cut to the group setting out from this point in the path. Vince is filming. Jeff grabs Jessa's hands.]
Vince: Let's go.
[General chatter and laughing. Ryan is far ahead of the group on the path as they start walking.]
Vince: All right.
Vince: [turns back to see Evan leaning towards the fallen tree, about to put his hand into a hole in the trunk] Evan! Dude, come on.
[Evan snaps out of his stupor and looks up at them, then walks away from the tree.]
[Cut to another part of the path. There is the same deliberate color-distortion as the last time Alex and Evan were fighting. They're doing it again, this time “sword fighting” with large sticks. The speed of the film is sped up.]
[Cut to the same part of the path, normal film. Evan is wandering away from the others down the path. Someone throws a stick at him; it misses.]
Jessa: That was pretty close.
[Evan walks towards the stick, holding up a hand in a 'wait a minute' gesture. Everyone laughs.]
Jessa: He just--
Vince: Just you wait.
[Cut to Evan charging down the path in slow motion towards Vince, holding two large sticks. He lightly hits Vince with them.]
[Cut to a shot of a bird of prey flying across the clear blue sky.]
[Cut to Jessa and Ryan walking towards a hiking map. There's a white clapboard house on the path behind them. The others are standing near or sitting on a low stone wall by the path. Pan over to the map again; Jessa is putting something in Ryan's backpack, while Evan is looking at the map, figuring out their location.]
[Cut to the same area, closer to the house and the fence around the property. Pan across the expanse of green field and trees.]
[Cut to Vince walking in front of a few others, who are sitting.]
Vince: Close your eyes and pretend it's a bad dream.
[Cut to Jessa and Jeff sitting on the wall. Jeff has removed his hat, and Jessa is fluffing out his hair. There's a lot to fluff out. It ends up at near-afro proportions when she's done.]
Evan: Oh my goodness.
Vince: And Jeff takes another one for the team. What a champ.
[Jessa finishes playing with his hair. Jeff stands up, starting to smooth it back down.]
Evan: [points at Jeff] Or the Heat Miser!
[Everyone laughs. Jeff starts to do a silly walk/march down the road, then stops almost immediately.]
Jeff: Those people are coming.
[More laughing. Jeff smooths down his hair and puts his hat back on.]
[Cut to a pair of wooden double doors on the outside of an abandoned house. Jessa is filming and walking towards the doors. One of the doors opens, and Alex steps out.]
Alex: Can you turn on the camera?
Jessa: It's on. I'm filming it already.
Alex: All right. [takes the camera] Thank you.
[Alex walks back inside. It appears to be a messy storage room.]
Alex: Is there any light? Let me put the light on my phone on. Wait guys.
[Cut to another room in an abandoned house. Ryan, Jessa, Jeff, and Evan are all peering up at the ceiling.]
Evan: There's spiders right there, actually. Oh god.
[Evan waves his arm over his head, trying to knock down a spiderweb.]
Alex: Tall spiders.
Evan: [still looking up] Oh, there's all kinda shit up there.
Jessa: There's a ladder.
[Evan reaches up, and loses his balance slightly. He recovers, and looks over at the wall, presumably at the ladder Jessa was talking about. Jeff walks towards him.]
[Abrupt cut to a dirty, cobweb-filled store room. There is no audio in this clip. The camera pans across a shelf containing a few dirty bottles and a rusty chain.]
[Cut to Jeff jumping down off a ledge in the storeroom from before, where Evan encountered a spiderweb. Alex is filming. Evan jumps down next.]
Alex: Let me film on your phone. (?)
[Evan reaches back up to take the camera so Alex can jump down. It's dark for a few seconds, then light again as Evan follows the others out of the room.]
Alex: Oh, dude!
[Cut to outside the house. Evan is filming some kind of rusted metal... thing. It looks like it might have been some kind of water pump?]
Evan: So... [laughs] what the hell is that?
[Cut to the exterior of another abandoned house. There is orange plastic construction fencing wrapped around the house. Alex, Jeff, and Jessa are checking out the windows. Evan is filming, and pans up to a broken second story window.]
Evan: What'd ya say, that's kinda old.
Jeff: [reading off a sign] Danger, unsafe structure. [He steps back from the window.]
Evan: There's, a--
[Cut to a shot of a large tree and the paved hiking path.]
Evan: [laughing and walking towards the tree] What, what is Vinnie doing?
[Cut to the gang on a large hill. Evan and Alex are standing, while Jessa, Ryan, and Vince are sitting nearby. Vince is on the phone. Jeff is filming.]
Jeff: Let the battle of the champions begin!
[Evan and Alex roll down the hill. Alex somersaults, while Evan does more of a log roll.]
Jeff: Why would you-- why would you tumble forward?
[He turns to continue filming as they roll past him. Alex gets up and runs to the tall grass at the bottom of the hill. Evan keeps rolling, and eventually stops, looking dizzy. Both Evan and Alex are laughing.]
Jeff: Now roll up the hill!
[Evan and Alex start running up the hill. Evan's still a bit unsteady on his feet. Sudden cut while they're running, apparently just past each other rather than up the hill.]
Jeff: Now wrestle! Wrestle now!
Evan: I'm not trying to run in a circle!
[Alex runs over to Evan and tries to tackle him. Evan laughs and pushes him off.]
Jeff: In the tall grass!
[Evan and Alex start walking back up the hill. Evan still seems dizzy.]
Jeff: Well done, team.
[Cut to the group back at the top of the hill. Alex is filming.]
Evan: In this video we probably said “hutu” about twenty-seven times. And people are gonna be like “what?”
[Vince comes into frame, leaning into a running stance.]
[Evan looks confused, but walks towards him.]
Vince: Whoever can make it to the tall grass the farthest wins.
[Both Evan and Vince get ready to run.]
Vince: Ready? Three, two, one, go!
[They take off running down the hill. Both come to a dead stop before hitting the tall grass. They laugh at each other, then start to walk back.]
Ryan: There's fucking Pokeman in the tall grass! [laughter from the group] Fuckin' Zubats and--
Jessa: Zubats and shit!
Ryan: --and Rattatats.
[Cut to the top of the hill again. Jessa is putting something in Ryan's backpack. Jeff is sitting on the ground. The film is sped up for the first part of this clip, then abruptly slows down. Evan charges up the hill and tackles Jeff while singing “Handlebars” by the Flobots. Evan manages to get behind Jeff, more or less pinning him, and wrestles his hat away. He throws it down the hill.]
[Cut to a still photograph of Jeff, post-tackle and hat-theft, still being grappled by Evan. He's looking at the camera in mild confusion.]
[Cut to Jeff filming the large, white house behind them. It looks like the same house they were near at 4:27.]
Jeff: You guys think these are like, legit houses? You think people live here?
Evan: Looks kinda like it.
Jeff: 'Cause if it was just like, a visitor's center, I don't think they'd have all this back here, you know?
Evan: Yeah, 'cause look, they've got like a nice yard and stuff.
[Jeff and Evan walk towards a small, walled off area, overgrown with plants.]
Jeff: That used to be a little garden.
[Cut to Evan standing in the 'gate' of the garden, looking at it. He seems distracted, his posture somewhat similar to when he was standing by the tree at 3:28.]
Jeff: You all right there, man? [pans around the yard]
Evan: [doesn't respond right away] Yeah.
[Evan turns and jumps down from the wall.]
[Cut to the group standing in a field near trees. Vince has picked up some kind of creature, probably a large toad.]
Evan: Oh my god!
Jessa: Oh, I wanna eat it!
Vince: [starts to offer it to her] Wanna hold it?
Jessa: I don't wanna hold it, I just wanna pet it.
[Vince starts to hand it to someone else. It wriggles away and drops back to the ground. Jessa shrieks in surprise.]
Ryan: Don't be droppin' him.
[Evan starts to lean down to pick it up, then stops.]
Evan: I don't really wanna touch it.
[Cut to the group walking down a path again. There are multiple conversations going on. Jeff is filming.]
Jeff: We gotta get Bernese mountain dogs and name them Cupcakes.
[Cut to them walking through a large open field. There's a single, huge tree some distance ahead of them. Again, multiple conversations are occurring. Vince is near the camera, and thus it is easiest to hear him.]
Vince: Turns out that noise in my backyard, it's actually not crickets. It's, uh, we had millions of tree frogs, just hanging out.
Alex: Wait, guys, know what?
[Jeff pans over to a picnic table. Evan is standing on it, one foot on the bench, one foot on the table. Alex, Vince, and Jessa join him in posing dramatically.]
[Cut to Vince running down the field towards the tree, ahead of the others.]
Jessa: --Marley and Me?
[Vince stops running very abruptly.]
Ryan: Watch Marley and Me. See who cries last.
Jeff: Become a god.
Jessa: I always cry right-- like, I cry when the movies starts.
Ryan: [fake crying] Opening credits!
[Vince turns back to talk to Evan, who is at the front of the group.]
Vince: As soon as I walked past this, there's like a barrier of buzzing.
Jeff: Oh god. Open field of leaves!
(?): Watch for poison ivy.
Jeff: [panning around] Dude, like how remote is this? This is beautiful!
[There's a loud yell from somewhere off in the distance.]
Jessa: Can we picnic?
Jeff: Yeah, right under this tree.
Jessa: Can we please?
Jeff: Yes. Cutie.
[They walk towards the tree. The rest of the group is talking, Evan might be singing again.]
Jessa: 'My Cicada'?
[Jeff laughs as they all gather under the tree.]
[Cut to the group continuing on the path, climbing over a fallen tree. Evan and Vince are talking about someone.]
Vince: Yeah, sure.
Evan: Something, something. Like, at least have the decency to notice people when they [unintelligible].
Vince: Did she ever, like, contact you back?
Evan: No, she still hasn't. It just aggravates me.
[Cut to the group gathered around an old well. It is the same one seen in a longer clip during '....'.]
Jeff: What'd you guys find? [leans over to look at the well] Oh, nice.
Evan: Want to move this to the side?
Vince: Nah, let's just hold it up, we're gonna close it in a minute.
[Cut to the group standing at the edge of a large pond or lake.]
Jessa: Do it.
Vince: I won't do it. You won't do it.
Jessa: That's what I just said.
Vince: Oh man, that's gross, look at all that shit.
[Cut to Evan and Alex standing on the porch of the house seen at 5:55. They appear to be prying the door open. Alex leans in to have a look inside.]
Alex: House of-- whoa.
Evan: Watch out, bro, there are nails sticking out of that, [Alex moves back and walks away] don't stick your head in where it, like, zings forward.
[He releases the door, and it slams closed. Jeff climbs up onto the porch.]
[Cut to the group back in the parking lot, gathered around a map of the park.]
Vince: All right, so you guys wanna do another trail? I mean, we just...
Evan: Uh, nah, I, I, I think we should, we should start headin' home before it gets too dark.
Vince: Dude, it's three o'clock, we've got--
Jeff: Let's hit that back one.
Vince: --like, six hours of light, bro.
Evan: Well, I mean, you know, just in case, I don't wanna, I don't wanna be out here when it's dark.
Vince: It won't take more than an hour.
Evan: Yeah, I know bro, but I think-- I kinda just wanna go home.
Vince: All right.
Evan: Y'know, before it gets too...
Vince: Well, I guess we had a good day anyway. You guys ready? Let's hit it.
Jeff: Head out.
- This video was filmed at Baldpate Mountain.
- Clips from A Day in the Life (or events that happened during the time the video was filmed but were not included in the entry) can be found in three out of four of the hidden videos (---, .-, and ....) as well as 78of76.avi, 77of76.avi and Centralia.
- It seems they do not remember the clips in the videos above, and the only video they can see but don't remember happening is 78of76.avi and 77of76.avi.